[ Renji gave a short squeeze back, the warmth of their touch flowing up his arm. His gaze softened, his voice taking on an almost tender quality. ]
You don't have to worry about that. There ain't any way you could disappoint me.
[ Honestly, Renji felt like if one of them was going to turn out to be a disappointment, it'd be him. Renji hardly measured up to his own expectations, hyper aware of all his deficits as a man. He didn't know how he measured up to Keigo's expectations, how he earned this much adoration from him considering Keigo saw so many sides of him he wished he hadn't seen. ]
Just keep livin' your life.
[ It was a deceptive thing to say, a short directive that encompassed so much. Asking Keigo to live meant asking him to fight. Fight the sorrow, the hopelessness, the loss of control. It meant asking him to keep being vulnerable and maybe letting his heart get broken again and again. It might be too unreasonable for him to ask after all that Keigo had been through. Surely everyone had a limit to what they could endure before exhaustion and despair set in. Renji knew that better than most men.
But knowing just made him more sure that if anyone had the strength to bear the absurdities of living, Keigo would. Because after all the ordeals he'd been through, he still sometimes smiled so bright that he could clear storms and light the sky. That was enough on its own for Renji to regard him with admiration. ]
no subject
You don't have to worry about that. There ain't any way you could disappoint me.
[ Honestly, Renji felt like if one of them was going to turn out to be a disappointment, it'd be him. Renji hardly measured up to his own expectations, hyper aware of all his deficits as a man. He didn't know how he measured up to Keigo's expectations, how he earned this much adoration from him considering Keigo saw so many sides of him he wished he hadn't seen. ]
Just keep livin' your life.
[ It was a deceptive thing to say, a short directive that encompassed so much. Asking Keigo to live meant asking him to fight. Fight the sorrow, the hopelessness, the loss of control. It meant asking him to keep being vulnerable and maybe letting his heart get broken again and again. It might be too unreasonable for him to ask after all that Keigo had been through. Surely everyone had a limit to what they could endure before exhaustion and despair set in. Renji knew that better than most men.
But knowing just made him more sure that if anyone had the strength to bear the absurdities of living, Keigo would. Because after all the ordeals he'd been through, he still sometimes smiled so bright that he could clear storms and light the sky. That was enough on its own for Renji to regard him with admiration. ]